IwantedLove,ShewantedWealth,

水静浅夕 · 发表于 2023-5-15 06:23:30

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first, I a patch. worse, I I her. I I wrong. I back, us. Finally, I I her, changed, become, me.

I a school. wife, a born, a job. moody, perimenopause. this, I I world. I a wife, children, a job, bank, kids' I market. I college. I Engineeringated, wanted. a schoolteachering firm. a years, a family. home, I agreed. baby. a I a family. peers. a mother, a daughter. a hip.

I daughter, Barbara, 17. a School. sister, Kathy, school. a car, doing. time, moodier, perimenopause. errands, restless. a a job. didn't teaching, fields. a woman, trim, striking. a job, offer. us, so. a company, city. Lyle, a community. a megachurch. work, was, were, dressed. I years. happy, excited. a family. fact, hadn't understandably tired, started, me, I a energy. words, again. a bed. seconds, mouth. a part, I pussy. I pussy. quickly, bed, back, mouth, face. access, I town. I cunt. I concentration best, time. I excited, I vigorously. a a her, I doing, back. came, a beast. then, a orgasm, I elbows. I obliged. a pleasure, a own, pussy. worked. a minutes, simultaneously possible. other's arms, intertwined, possible. a a giggle, was. a sleep. night. Elaine's mine, a said, "hmm, what's I regions. it, I fucking. over, rounds, first, years.

I a department, I area, I'd I enthusiasm. a finish, I thought. night, I a spectacularly sex, ear, "what I a you? you, love, you." I universe.

So, I nights. nicer, weekends. job, I hiccup. I a bit, okay, routines. I hadn't a it.

"Oh, didn't I mention? I account. It's I I own" response.

"Oh" answer. wasn't said, I it, business. question: hers? Still, I vanity. But, Elaine's change. job. with, Mr. Lyle, owner. a engineer, I a I present. a bastard. a man, a fellow. Again, everyone, I guess. continued. me, enthusiasm. distant. time, me, was. "the girls." lovemaking, a thing, nonexistent. Indeed, I a light, touch, it. I'd flirt, a little, look. announcement. night. Didn't in, norm. I ready, cook, late, fed. girls' rooms. I up.

"You Bobby, a guy..." I in.

"Who's Bobby?" I I girl's room.

"Bobby Lyle, boss. I a promotion." a me.

"Congratulations, honey, doing?"

"Personal assistant." levels, first, I Robert, Bobby, Elaine's girls, me.

"Wow," I said, "that's a jump." I responded, I girls. girls, me, continued. "The great. I'll a lot, it's everything." I questions. Clearly, didn't interrupt. I a kitchen. night, bed, I us. annoyed.

"What mean?"

"You've lately, distant, me. What's on?"

"Nothing's on" a annoyance. "I've busy."

"It that. kids, me."

"Well, it's me. it's you. can't I job."

"Independent? in, utilities, eat, I children, I work. responsibilities obligations? I obligations. independence." I exasperated.

"Fuck you. don't understand."

I a breath, a calm, I responded, "Please darling, understand. I you, I again."

"What's understand. I changedit." that, bathroom, it. later, emerged. I silence.

I continued, "the important. I I up. I partnership. independent, decisions, other. aren't anymore. Why?" answer, didn't me. bed, covers, me. over. morning, I her, breakfast, up, down. I kitchen. I a morning, morning. me, nothing, a coffee. breakfast, alone. night, 11 p.m. I room. house, I said, "Hey babe, night, huh?" me, bedroom, shower. a night. week. morning, a weekend. I reply. trouble. working. afternoon, me, girls, them, wanted. I supper. better, minimal, matters. now, "because work," night. Sunday, home, shopping. weeks. Bobby, shopping, gifts. return. I help. that, I master. "Clean rooms." "Set table." "Wash dishes." "Take room." Kathy, youngest, I a rapport. I had. fun, meals, failed. a a competence.

Barbara, oldest, I a in. a friends, I drinking. that, drinking, drink, driving, a drink. a ride, a amnesty. I her, deal. I evening. a fit. weekend, home. routine. I punishment, shopping, myself, girls. supper, I mother's driver's off. roles. I I hadn't that. eyes. Monday, I work. a refuge, a marriage. work, I respect. I problems. I associates. issues, issues. work. weekend, wasn't a distraction. I a attorney. property, alimony, custody. I a standby. I wasn't trigger. I dead, I couldn't myself...yet. quiet. 7PM, eaten, phone. I a dinners. I I things, me. So, up, I I invited.

"You wouldn't it. They're wouldn't anyone."

"Maybe I them, a world." narrowed. didn't come, event. I I didn't that, I with.

"Look, I work. I don't there, can't that?" said, topic. stairs, listening.

"Listen dear, I marriage. completely. I space, us. that, please. I've months, asked. here, us," I a

"or over?" girls, said, "Okay. tears, won't it, okay. I space. I won't I working, understand?"

I didn't understand, I said, "Agreed. I won't you."

I reasonable. I before, surely, crumbling, too. Besides, life. I I back.

Then, later, a bunch, desperate. evening, a Convertible. mom. I a later. excitedly, was. a spin, standing. Indeed, in, I said, "girls only." night. didn't 11, a night. I room, entered, giggling. followed, there, didn't pause, didn't anything, upstairs. I followed.

"Geez, hon, that's a ,000 car. I'm impressed, expense." I I bedroom. me, a smile, shower. all. car. 6 job, ,000 a management, construction, a gofer, personality.

I obvious, "Bobby" practice. car? A a done? rendered? Geez, 20 a toad. wealthy.

I a confrontation office. I dreaded, simple, curiosity. a public, I months. communication us. matters, I up. no, venue. I I dinner, I car. Again, no, wouldn't all. space, I said, "okay, sure, there." 6:30 bar, socializing, dinner. I five, bar, a waited. I easily. six, Elaine's a early, bar, socializing. I conversations. stuff, stuff. door. a whisper. "Look, is, slut. I don't husband."

"Maybe he's coming" reply.

"You admit, a part, room. won't around." moment, a a ass. earshot.

I a scotch, neat. rapidly, a help. event, wouldn't hurt.

Apparently, over. "How here, Jack?" asked.

"Not long. a drink, that's all." full. I I hadn't kiss.

"Well, I everything, a bit." I eavesdropping a embarrassed. "It's okay," I them, "I've known. don't mind, don't her. "You know, peace, thing." spoke. "I sorry, known."

"A while, car, I end. making." head, said, "rumor present."

"Oh? I didn't engagement."

Yeah, a now, husband." wasn't conversation. "I isn't now."

"Well, I don't longer. Anyway, I'm be. tonight, I time. know, peace." I a second. Elaine's fault, time.

"Wow" I calmly, "that shitty."

Shortly, afterwards, minutes. I door. us, tables, front. seat. together. is, I. I unaccompanied, Bobby, Bobby's left, right. Elaine, empty.

I in. in, in. I tag, table, table, "Robert Lyle" I start. a I doing. didn't long. I whisper. "What doing, Robert's seat. back!"

Oh, I'm you're mistaken, sweetheart. spouse. I a mistake. I mean, don't I you? deceptive, other, we?" a room. us.

"Stop it, Jack, me."

"Embarrassing you? in, boss. a slut. you? me." now, us. "Sir, I leave. You're a ungentlemanly."

"

Ungentlemanly? a man's wife. Sir, family, ungentlemanly. You, sir, a hypocrite. man's wife, adultery? a

a a ,000 automobile? I'll leave, Sir, I

a gentleman, you, sir, a pig." Elaine, "Sweetheart, home, I family, otherwise, I workers."

"You bastard!" I out. a look. Robert, rage, Elaine, embarrassment. drama. I bar, whiskey, a I years. I drive, drink, grief. a a ago, I commiserating troubles.

"Bill, I'm a night. time, I up. I over." I need. later. I happened, talked. on. I said, "this interesting." room, name. I myself.

Mr. Cork, I'm Finnegan. Mr. peace. happened.

"Well, I party, I a kiss, affair, I it, up, ungentlemanly. I I a wife. I me, I a a ride.

"I firmly, I yell." responded, "yeah, that's it. a madman, mayor, stuff, that. I'll a report, I citation. a here. I here, won't pretty."

"Yes, officer, I'm now." left. home, I daughter, Kathy, home. daughter, mother's a somewhere.

I happening. I a having. news. I together, what, I I her, what. a a too. morning, I Barbara, before. I I, me, need, her.

Oh? say?

"She a dinner."

"Yes, I I did. I her. I so."

"Yeah, whatever" dismissively. room. day, early. I together. I lunch, friends. mother. a distraction, supper, experiment. okay. time, eaten. I meant, okay. day, school, I work. work, buzzing. "fondled" husband. Lyle, me. peace. husband. I night, empty. not. I table, read:

"I Bobby. me. attorney." else. later, a a assets, house. a I rights, daughters, agreement, I wouldn't support. again. hard. morning, I I attorney. appointmentsrved. I assets, house, proceeds. rights. I a Elaine. said:

Elaine, sale. I me.

I I you. I don't I failed. I lacking, I changed. I you, love, I how. life. I for.

I you. else. case. us, us, a children. visitation. objected, a one, a a kids. I a alone. attorney's offices. there, sight. I attorney's room, a time, first. cold. sternly, "I Bobby. I don't again. Satisfied?"

"Why?" I asked.

"Why? a loser, that's why. can't should. back." breathtaking. response, "I'm Barbara. I I wanted. mind, I you."

"I won't." room." in. "Dad, I sorry." red. crying. "It I Mom."

"But I you, can't I."

"No dad, won't work. It's I Mom."

"I don't understand. can't me?"

"Dad, please, I can't. I can't." room. ran. moment, Elaine's Bobby. I face, tears. a composure, in.

"Happy?"

"No. Devastated." I quietly. "I won't resist. Elaine, hurts, children, wept, I'll understand?" I out, face. I Bobby, said, "loser."

I Elaine's eyes, said, pity.

So, I family. house, investments, accounts, furniture. I family. overwhelming. I a work. Elaine's me. I happening. daughters, I Kathy:

Dad, I okay. I you. don't I you. out, out. won't anyone, lawyers.

I I lawyer's office. I didn't said, me. a wanted. I I you. I myself, I didn't do.

Dad, I you.

I immediately. I "our secret." I I fault. I what, I her. I was. I good, a her. I sister, she? responded, "not good. I well. I dad, a stress."

I quickly, "don't names, I me." was, "I'm you. It's me. dad. Period."

I a relief. life. I harder, grief. correspondence continued, a lives. things. today. What's tomorrow. friends, occasionally, a interesting. dating. I wasn't now, I hadn't mom. persisted, I I'd it.

"I don't I it." attend. I present. approached.

"What here?"

"I daughter."

"But away!" parents.

"No, I I haven't. on, Elaine, a a isn't anyone." calm.

"Don't it, you."

"He can't. me, destroy. play." off. evening, a did, me. I there. a while. I I would. week, married. Kathy, a affair, attended. a a kerfuffle. a bridesmaid. refused, wedding, it. didn't happy. Kathy's mother's family. angry, their, a ceremony. I else. I strong.

dinner, divorce. I a a a love, sin. didn't way. a pariah. Barbara's graduation. I didn't go. I there, me, Kathy.

I a card. read: "Congratulations future. anything, I here." later. I a work, a house. I vehicle. me. "Good evening, gentleman, I you?" I asked.

"Yeah" voice. "Mr. family."

"You children? a second, I understanding, I don't don't too. I agreement, about?"

"He kids, it!"

"Did card? lines. mental?"

"Just it!" left. I wife's way. day, I Kathy. I hadn't sister's graduation. card. angry. scared. me, a a school's library.

I agreed, lawyer's office, I me. that, mother's sister's forever. And, said, me. years, she'd

I didn't argue. I have. I Kathy's age, deeply. I didn't that. I equilibrium, me. herself. I work, grew, I firm. position. good. child. wanted. a sporty, Mercedes. license, Barbara's Corolla. mother's card. allowance, I collapsed. I child, surprisingly, it, Bobby. have. a past. I mine: sailing, I a boat, club. Otherwise, I work, it. I over. Bobby. a hotel, a up, fewer. went, "work, play" welcomed.

I mom, information, a topic. information, I significant.

Then, years, a confrontation. honors. I go, go. I hesitate.

I auditorium. I a Bobby. a relationship, too, I figured, Elaine, unexpected. I a a me, me. didn't matter. (which, way, tears), mother. me. coming. free. up.

"You him, angry, along.

"And you," me, "I understanding."

"She's daughter, Laney.'" I replied, before, "I come. understanding rights."

"You badly, asshole! isn't us."

I repeated, "I come." a anger, sadness. head, a pace.

I home, everything. night, away.

"Thank graduation" started. "No happened, a day." on, "Bobby furious. home, me, 'ungrateful bitch.' I him, home, me, me, that, me, I ceremony."

"I answered, 'because dad.' face, name, room, I thing, I sight. Bobby, I night."

I house. mother's custody. couldn't monster. morning, I lawyer. a visitation. I Bobby's company. I didn't a Bobby, I box, "Personal Private." Ironically, gossip.

I late, usual, didn't nine. I I eat, number. I answered. Elaine. whisper. "Jack, now. I phone. you. now. leave, hurt."

"I'm running, Elaine. me't lose."

"Please, Jack, please, it's late. Oh, Jesus, Jack, run."

"Thanks call, Elaine. I'll right. Don't worry." I up.

I office, old, 7.65 pistol, a War. I a round, safe, house, bedroom, downstairs, lights, a door, down, police. I wasn't ambush, I wasn't ambushed.

I I a a a over. I a off. I arrived. hide. I her, "I'm house" I yard, a a sledgehammer. I strategically door. door, I out, "Get out, I weapon!" a sledgehammer, 2/3ds height. I again, "Walk away, I fire!" open. I out, "Stay out! I I shoot!" back, "bullshit, wimp! wouldn't a gun, prayers." doorway, house. I quiet. a me, him, target, said, "there are, up, I'm you!" forward. training, I round. a loud, me, a sand. head. round, aimed, a groan. phone. I siren, I down, I intruders. I a happening. unresponsive. a weird, sound. I him, back, chest. I a wound, from. I hand, bleeding. lung. eased, a seal. speak.

"My brother! brother?" I a out: "Police! person, back!"

I I told, spoke, "the a wound, hole." me, weapons. I was, a it. I would. wound. arrived. victim, defibrillator compressions. a ambulance. I a a officer, 15 I I detectives. I a happened. morning, Bobby, rights, I I invasion, I instigator. say, lawyer. Elaine, invoked. returned, prosecutor's investigation.

I 11 o'clock morning. I dead. I things, a I investigation over. I a hotel, office. I couldn't sleep. I a before, I thing. 8 o'clock night, rang. Elaine.

"Jack, you?" asked.

"I'm home'm a hotel."

"I'm everywhere. you?" happened, I ever, night's call.

"Why know?"

"Jack, I out. I go." I up.

"Okay, Elaine. minutes. talk. Kathy."

I wasn't up, eyes, arms. a sort. I a happened. a prosecutor, dead. her, "that a yours" got. Elaine, 911. quit, house.

I yet. hadn't wouldn't. I it. not, stop. I stay. stay, him. I I cash. I elevator, said, "thank you, Jack. I I don't this."

"No, Elaine, don't. deserve, is. Let's 8 next." I in, I tomorrow, too. morning, I me. a while. I same. I was, I I shaky. I a down.

"Mom's down. afraid. you. She's won't that. you."

"Okay, sweetie, worries. it's I help. a time, possible."

"Dad, I'm this, it. I don't said, sorry."

"Well, that's good" I a voice. wants, I interfere. you. here."

"Dad, I don't do. I don't Mom, I Bobby."

"Well, sweetie, me. I need. me, that's too."

"Thanks, Dad. I, I don't I do." I boyfriends. a days. arm. I out, "Elaine, okay, help."

"Jack, it's okay, it" responded.

"Get way, wimp" Bobby.

"Yep, you're a on." I ground. glared, me.

"What Kathy?" I away.

"You slut." Bobby, hotel.

I Kathy, "I'm sorry, honey, didn't help."

"I know. said, it's decision."

"I'm name."

"Don't worry, he's worse."

"I me." I Kathy. I a floor. I office. time. news, apparently, I a invasion.

I Elaine. much, a law, back. it, confessed, Bobby. down. murder. murder, explained, a a perpetrators, trigger. Thus, a a thugs, , thug. Bobby. "business" disputes. century.

doctors, a scandal. violence.

Meanwhile, Bobby's condo. mom, depressed, couldn't leave, go. first, witness, hopeless. I didn't I abusive, her, that, testifying, me, what. that, a bargain, months, a years. divorce, a assets, money, for. didn't time. hour's me. mom, I Elaine. a semester's expenses. town. I expenses, town. up. a happened, it. I nodded. education. I agreed, a University. why. "Well, a it. I University. Also, a a babies. I'm I that." her, argue, I listened, hadn't mind. me, a I was. I asked, Bobby. anger. "And out, lady." family.

"Oh?" I responded, "and I that?"

"Because 20 life, deserved."

"Well I 20 years, me. I'm I anything."

"Oh, on, back. her."

"Actually, back." I responded, "after I peers, I city. I'm I position, I'll I left. stayed, I a now."

"Really? I didn't know. tuition."

"Oh, I it. I money, well. I I couldn't it. I a money. I mother, I money.

"Please, Dad, reconsider. I I stay."

"Yeah, I don't either. thinking, people, things, love, forever, around.

"You to."

"Huh?"

"Never mind, sweetie. Look, a one. a thought."

I door. added, "By way, don't grandmother. She's a life. support. I mother's up. a of. can't you." a look.

I her. glared, say, thoughts, out. talk. I her. I agreed. evening. in, hadn't changed. years. I she'd wine. coffee. I down. I was. I okay, a coolness, up. a tuition. I I Barbara, a school. I didn't understand, school. I I boys. sigh.

"Well, yeah, it."

"I a a life."

"No, no, I'm she's a husband."

"Yeah, okay. same."

"Can I why. she'll a mother?"

I a response, a pause, "worried? No, much. diggers. weren't wasn't a a looks. No, quickly. I dismal. I college, doesn't hers. a school, her, won't matter." a said, "you a romantic, Jack. been. simple. a mind. sight, mind. leaves, won't follow. Please, reconsider. can't years. a up."

"I don't her. I you. you. I integrity." grimaced, a cry.

"I know, I know. I life, I daughter's life. I I have. I it." sobs. a hands.

"I'm that" said. "I don't I'll Jack, I anymore, life. I you. I yours. not, I loved, sounds. Don't worry, isn't a pitch. I I hard. I that. a father, I away. I a fool. I soul." up. "I offer."

"Sit down." I firmly. "First, don't thing. I other, I now. Second, I a little. school, won't thinks. a I with. here, house, her. it's kids, in. decide. I I soon, I there, it'll work. Hey, guys, too. in."

"You...you that."

"No. in, might. I'd them." daughter, I to. there, members. a a it. there, pickings. matter, I a scandal, isn't snooty, I you.

"I can't that."

"Yeah, I know. life. daughters, me, life. I I somewhere, away. Don't worry, I'm you. We, more. entangled, a entanglement, nothing. works, I won't a kids. a fella. But, a fellow, problem." me, wrinkled, a puzzle. again.

I a word. I up, away, wine, a cup, said, "you're tonight. You'll Barbara's room. a thing, you." up, before. "I a plan. I years."

"Yeah, let's there. a bed, a reptile, empty." mine, eyes, said, "you a marvelous, lover. selfish, conquest, love. love, I that."

"Please stop, Elaine. ain't happen." quiet.

I up. did. I wall.

"These home. I haven't them, I any. first, I I I didn't anything, engineering. frustrating, heart.

"After a I somehow, I back, that, I had. returned, receded. I back. I something. I in. a taken. you. children's life. point, I a I happiest.

"I don't now. I a a a wife. gone. a was, a a by.

I on. face. a spoke.

"Jack, I sorry. I I life. I I Barbara, I I Kathy. too, I this, don't. I forgiveness, I don't it." forgiveness. it, it's forgiveness. Elaine, I a ago. I peace. sake, kids. home, gone, children's home, willing. a smile. A her. said, "yes, yes, yes. I deserve."

"No, dear, deserve." I hug.

I table, children, us, present. beds. a I known. mattered, I a cover. a I employees. news. him, Elaine's else. together, miserable. first, a man. people. Bobby, money. a while, controlling, smaller.

I politiely, finished, I now. a moment, again. "Mostly?" asked.

"What?"

"You a empty? I dating."

I smiled. "I wasn't."

"Okay, with?"

"I a friend, a age. a small, restaurant. I a lot. a mom, her, I a week. heartbreaks, other."

"She sex?"

"I you. no, really. Still, true, honestly, together. a out, boyfriend. I a companionship a time."

"Do her?"

"Yes, I restaurant. I a tip. well." look, bothered. Sorry, I a monk?"

"Well, actually, I did." ways. hen. I "urge" a bit, 18 mistakes. line, "don't I did." job, a home. companionship. that, companionship bit. class. me, prospects. sciences, premed, school. a student, I parents. grandchildren followed. a college. transfer, again, back. Barbara's poor, more. another, I right, hadn't yet, I no. Eventually, slowly, me, behalf. change. harder. sciences, sociology, psychology, a master's therapy. positions. a later, a man, a officer, grandchildren.

I married. enough.

Oh, mine, didn't boyfriend, I a housekeeper. I that, course, I it, complain. I companionship two. a I a CEO.